Beyond The Webcam

Working remote has been a boon for our health and wellbeing in so many ways. More time at home and less time commuting makes us happy – it’s time better spent resting, being with family, and tending to selfcare habits that ease the stress and strain on the mind, body and spirit.

We can all use better work life balance and some relaxing me-time in our very busy lives but it’s not all home sweet home. Working remote can lead to mental health struggles due to loneliness and isolation, and on top of that, increased appearance dissatisfaction. It appears that doing all those online meetings have us zooming in on our faces and many of us don’t like what we see.

Is that a new wrinkle? A double chin? Was my nose always that sharp? We’re seeing ourselves alongside others on screens for long periods of time and that can lead to a mental and emotional distress. We zoom in on our perceived flaws and fear online participants are focused on them too and passing judgment.

A 2023 study found that discomfort with one’s appearance during videoconferencing led to an increased fixation on appearance and comparing ourselves to others, which in turn led to anxiety and impaired work performance, including burnout.

Therapist Emily Hemendinger sees it in her practice: More of her therapy clients report struggling with appearance concerns related to online meetings. Plastic surgeons are seeing it too – 86% of plastic surgeons polled report videoconferencing as the most common reason for cosmetic concerns among their patients, with complaints centring on noses and wrinkles.

Rigid beauty standards and hyper-focus on appearance hound us 24/7 and mounting research documents the harmful effects of screen time on our wellbeing and self esteem. While a tendency to compare ourselves to others is natural, this pre-occupation is leading to depression, anxiety and a negative body image, reports Hemendinger, a clinical social worker who specializes in body image disorders.

“We tend to overestimate how much others are noticing about us and that fuels fears of others judging our appearance, flaws in our appearance and actions.” She calls it the spotlight effect.

Take the spotlight off yourself. Boost body comfort and love yourself with these tips:

• Try viewing yourself and others as a whole human, not parts of a body: Be aware of comments you make about your own and other’s appearances. It’s important to focus on a person’s innate qualities beyond appearance. “We should be conscious of our comments, no matter how well intentioned. Negative comments about appearance have been linked to worsened self-esteem and mental health,” she says.
• Practice being intentional and mindful while videoing for work. “Focus on what other people are saying in a video call instead of peering at your own face. This will allow you to better pay attention and increase the connection you are feeling with others on the call.”
• Reduce social media scrolling day and night, do a phone call instead of a Zoom meeting, or end a meeting after 45 minutes instead of the full 60 minutes. Setting a timer can help stick to your limits.
• Unfollow people or accounts that make you feel negative about yourself and your life. These are staged glimpses into people’s lives. No one is perfect, no life is perfect.
• Revel in gratitude and focus on the positives and blessings you have in your life instead of what you don’t have.

Meanwhile, you may think that turning off self-view is the answer when it comes to group videoconferencing but while that can be a great short-term, it’s not a long-term solution. What it’s doing is reinforcing avoidance behaviour and negative beliefs that you need to hide from your image or can’t bear to look at yourself, explains Hemendinger.

And she wants you to keep in mind that videoconferencing is not a direct cause of appearance concerns. It is a contributing factor. Stopping videoconferencing will not solve your appearance dissatisfaction.

“In order to improve your relationship with your appearance, it will take time to work on your self-esteem, self-worth, and mental health. Remember that you are more than your appearance. Your worth is not measured by how you look.” You may need to get help from a qualified therapist.